That is the question our 17 year old daughter kept asking herself on Saturday night. It wasn’t just any normal Saturday night. This was the daddy-daughter dance, except she wasn’t with her dad, she was with “Mr. Todd”.
So at some point during the night her thoughts turned south and she started to ask herself, “What if?”
“What if I was still with my parents?”
“What if I hadn’t been abused by every man in my life up until I was 11?”
“What if my mom had stood up for us kids?”
“What if my life were “normal” like these other kids?”
“What if?”…and the list goes on
I was proud of her. She pulled her self out of that deep pit of self-loathing and made the best of the night. I could see her smiling as we danced together to an oldie, I can’t remember what it was.
And as she told Sarah and I later of her struggles and questions, we couldn’t help but sympathize with her and understand that those feeling were normal.
However in those moments I had a list of my own “What if” questions I hope she would eventually be able to ask the next time she was at the daddy-daughter dance.
I hope that we are able to display the love of Christ and the Gospel of Christ in such a way that she will come to those moments and fight back the “What if” questions with another set of “What if” questions.
The ones I hope she will someday be able to ask go like this:
“What if God had not rescued me out of that abusive home?”
“What if God had not loved me so much that he sent a group of teachers to fight on my behalf?”
“What if Truett Cathy didn’t love kids as much as he does?”
“What if I hadn’t been given a second chance with Winshape?”
“What if Jesus Christ had never come to reconcile me to the Father through his own sacrifice and abuse on the cross?”
There is another Daddy-daughter dance that I want to take her to one day. I may not drive her there in a big white van. This is the daddy-daughter dance that I will prepare her for for the rest of her life. It will be the daddy-daughter dance that truly matters. This one she will dance before her eternal Father. This one she won’t have to worry about her make-up or dress because she will be clothed in Christ’s righteousness. This one, she won’t have to worry about being embarrassed because all shame and tears will be wiped away by nail-scarred hands. The one I am preparing her for might have “What if” questions, but my prayer is that they are more likely to be the second set of “What if’s” and not the first.