To my wife…

I’m a fairly sensitive husband.  My wife and I decided 4 years ago that when we brought Gideon home from Africa to start our family, she would stay at home with him.  She would become a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM).  I was on board.  We didn’t make a lot of money so this decision would carry a huge financial weight.  It never worked out financially, but the decision that we made proved time and time again to be the right one for us.

I never once thought my wife had it easy, staying home all day with our children.  I never once thought she was taking advantage of all this new found free time watching Oprah, getting mani’s and pedi’s, and basking in the luxury that is being at home all day.  But I never could have imagined what it was really like until I found out for myself.

I now realize that believing it was a tough job and experiencing it as such are two extremely different things.  Its as vast a difference as watching “Saving Private Ryan” and believing that D-Day must have been pretty tough, and actually putting your boots on the beaches that cold June day.  I had no idea.

It is for that reason I have set out to write a song dedicated to my wife.  Okay, I can’t really write musical lyrics.  What I can do though is take a classic country favorite and put my own spin on it.  This song goes out to all those SAHM with husbands that don’t exactly get it.  It is to the tune of “The Gambler” by Kenny Rodgers.  If you have never heard it, first, shame on you and secondly here is a link to refresh your memory.

Now here’s my version:

The Wife

On a warm summer’s eve, ’cause we were goin’ nowhere

I sat up with my wife, we were both to tired to sleep

So we took turns a starin’ at Facebook in the darkness

Til’ boredom overtook us and she began to speak

She said “Hon, I’ve made my life, out of readin’ “O’ the Places.”

And knowin’ if there’s trouble by the way kids hold their eyes

So if you don’t mind me sayin’, I can see we’ve traded places

If you make me some coffee I’ll give you some advice.”

So she handed me that bottle, baby drank down the last swallow

Put her in the bassinet, and kissed her goodnight

And the night got deathly quiet, You should’a seen her expression

Said, “If you’re gonna stay at home, babe, you gotta learn to do it right.”

You got to know how to hold’em (kids), know how to fold’em (clothes)

Know when to walk away and pray like a Nun.

You’ll always count your blessings when they’re finally at the table

There’ll be time enough for romance when retirement’s come.

Every mother knows that the secret to survival

Is knowin’ what to throw away and knowin’ when to sleep

‘Cause every night there’s dinner, and they all wanna be ‘the winner”

And the best you can hope for is your sanity to keep.

And when she finished speakin’, she turned back toward the window

Turned out the night-light and faded off to sleep

And somewhere in the darkness, my wife she got even

‘Cause in her final words I found a pace no man can keep.

You gotta know how to scold’em, know how to mold’em

Know when to get away and just have some fun

You never count your money cause they’ll spend it if they’re able

There’ll be time enough for talkin’ when retirement’s come

You got to know how to hold’em, know how to fold’em

Know when to walk away and pray like a Nun

You’ll always count your blessings, when they’re finally at the table

There’ll be time enough for hobbies when retirements come….


About Todd Van Dyke

Father, Husband, Son, and most of all lover of Christ.
This entry was posted in Parenting. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to To my wife…

  1. Pam Martin says:

    A wise man you are becoming with a wise wife to to teach you and to love you. Enjoy your many Blessings and take them day by day. Always thank God for the life you have ups and downs included and your journey will be full.

  2. “pray like a nun”

    that made me LOL. Good one.

  3. stephanye says:


    today was our kids first day back at school. it’s the first time in 10 years all my kids have been at school all day.

    one of my friends laughed as she said, “i bet you’ll be sitting home eating bon-bons and propping your feet up”.

    the frierson’s gave us wonderful advice. the “freshman year” is the toughest. so far, we agree.

  4. Justin Castile says:

    Who knew those Winshape skills would come in handy in married life. Very nice Todd and it was a nice touch to have Kenny singing in the back ground while I read the song. My wife stays at home with our two kiddos too…so I’ll have to get her to read this as well, she will appreciate it. Nice Job!

    • Thanks Justin. I was waiting for a Winshaper to out me on my songs skills. You have to know it wasn’t the Sioux days that helprd much with it though. All though I can’t hear Willie Nelson without thinking of you and the Sioux.

  5. Pingback: 2010 in review | Moose at a Full Gallop

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