All day yeyesterday all I could sing in my head was Steven Curtis Chapman’s song “Dive”. Okay, I didn’t sing the song just the first two lines of the chorus. It goes like this:
“I’m divin’ in, I’m going deep…
Du dop de dop du want to be.
Lost in the flow..do do de do hmmm de do doh
So sink or swim, I’m divin’ in”
Well that’s my version at least. It pretty much sums up they way I felt yesterday. No going back now. Let’s dive in. We go from a family of 5 to 7 in just a couple of minutes. How would this go? This is the first two of what I hope will be countless.
I kept thinking about people like George Muller. Google him, read about him, stand in awe of the God he served. I kept saying to myself, “So many have done so much more with so much less.” It was humbling. I mean he cared for about 10,000 children in his lifetime. I have some catching up to do.
I realized, as I didn’t get up today to go to that desk job, when I didn’t put on that suit, when my job today was to care for/help care for one newborn, a 21 month old, a 5-year-old girl, a Gideon, a 6-year-old boy, two dogs, and a wife, that I was wasting my life! Wasting it on Christ. It is true. We will either waste our lives on Christ or waste it pursuing this world’s idols. Now I am not saying that doing what I am doing is the only way to waste your life. You can still waste your life on Christ and go to the desk job, put on the suit, and walk into the office. It’s more a posture of the heart. This is just how God has called me to waste mine.
I realized that God knew when Esther was coming. He knew when this opportunity would open up for us. And he ordained that it would all happen at the same time. I think God wanted us to start off on the right foot. Tired, humbled, and praying. He is perfected in our weakness right?
I realized that we will never be on time as a family again.
I realized that just about the time we are done with lunch it is time to start dinner.
I realized that a hammock hung between two trees can keep four kids busy for days. (at least two days so far) I might need to get more creative tomorrow.
I realized that Stay at Home moms are amazing. Seriously, amazing. How do you do it?
I realized that life will never look the same.
I realized that Truett Cathy is one of the most amazing people I have ever known.
I realized that getting to eat popcorn with chopsticks is an adventure in the kid world.
I realized that the fact that I can “pull off my thumb and put it back on” gives me instant kid-cred.
I realized that children are full of enormous potential and I am blessed to put my hand to the task of potential finding.
I realized that an ailing great-grandmother dropping off her two children to live with us simply needed to hear that her children (great-grandchildren) were not in a program, institution, or facility. They were in a family.
And finally I realized that “normal” doesn’t live here anymore. He moved out yesterday.